Most people are familiar with the popular American series “1000 ways to die”. We all know that some of the methods portrayed might sound too fictitious but if we are to be true to ourselves, we are already living our own ways to die especially if you were born and raised here.
You might ask, why this logic? Well the answers aren’t far fetched because while we were still young, the kind of punishments we had to endure could kill others who neither had our kind of upbringing or the hard knock life we lived.
For instance, your dad tells you to pass the television remote and you reply “Baba, is your hand paining you?” or your mum says you called her a liar when you argue that you didn’t do what she claimed you did. Believe it or not, this is the number one death-inspired crime in many Nigerian homes as either a cane, whip, belt, shoe or anything close to them at that point in time might be used on you. if you are a Nigerian and none of these were used on you, then check if you are really a Nigerian.
A few other include you refusing to stop at a checkpoint after being stopped by police or being involved in an incident only to be rejected by healthcare facilities for not having the necessary resources or knowhow to attend to it, living day to day on debts because you have to settle “Omonile and Agberos” aside tax collectors while trying to hustle just to mention a few.
It’s no surprise that a large number of people today emigrate out of the country in search of greener pastures and longevity so if you see anyone who is presently above the age of 60, do give them a round of applause for making it this far.